Proper Followers

Monday, February 27, 2012

Dream - Three

THEY CAN ONLY DREAM

concave plastic notel open both ends

the honeymoon suite for my poetry friends

efficient as a mobile home that rolls

rocks when the drunk kicks it on his way past

hums when some bum sicks up all over it

and this is home to the best poet I know

and he has holes in the soles of his shoes

and wears musty and old hand me down clothes

and he lives in a plastic pipe that rolls

he and his princess the poetess goddess

they scrawl their poetry on the concave walls

in a shared red and blue blood mixed with love

propped up against the square peg plywood door

they optimise their day writing poetry

newsprint curtains blankets street sheets scream same

the best poet in the world and his princess

the treacherous candle burning both ends

they can only dream about a hot bath

the only shower they get is the rain

out there alone but not lonely white cold

200509

Originally posted here.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Total Recall - Post Two

THREE TO THREE PAST THREE ON A SATURDAY AFTERNOON
ON THE KIPPAX STREET IN MOSS SIDE MANCHESTER IN 1969
It was Saturday afternoon at three o’clock when the chant went up.
Manchester Boot Boys!
And the Bovver Girls joined in, taking the bubble gum out of their mouths.
And expertly spinning it round and round and round an index finger.
Manchester Boot Girls!
They cried, flicking the sticky gum over the heads of the police line.
Towards the Rockers who gathered on the left side of the steep terrace.
The Boot Boys were a makeshift mob of Skinheads and Scooter-boys and Mods.
Most had Steelies, Hobbies and Docs on their feet and the Mods wore Oxfords.
The Bovver Girls wore Monkey Boots to the match in those days, with red socks.
And the Mods and the Skinheads and the Bovver girls all wore Crombie coats.
The Scooter-boys had Fishtail Parka’s with tin badges on the front.
They rode Lambretta’s with ‘Sex Machine’ emblazoned on the side panels.
The Greasers wore leather jackets with studs and sleeveless denim colours.
They all said that they rode Triumph Bonneville’s and six-fifty Norton’s.
The ageing Ted’s used to stand next to the Rockers on the left hand side.
The Ted’s always wore their drainpipes and winkle pickers or blue suede shoes.
When the game went quiet the Bikers would taunt the Scooter-boys like this:
‘Are you there skin?’
They would sing,
And the chant would come back,
‘Are you there Grease?
And the Rockers would laugh, giving a little wave to provoke the Mods.
‘Back to school on Monday!’
The Greaser’s would jeer.
‘Back to school on Monday!
But soon things would settle down and the whole of the Kippax Street would cheer.
When City scored a goal – everywhere, all round the ground the chant would ring.
Manchester la, la, la, la,

Manchester la, la,la, la...
MSC261107

This is a link to a story here about the Moss Side Stadium with pictures of The Kippax Street Stand!

The above was originally posted on my STG Bloggage in 2007

Monday, February 20, 2012

Dream - Two

dream walk
it should have been a breeze a walk
in the park but there were no trees
or grass the earth was parched dry and
sun cracked – we walked with the other
safari tourists through this place

this barren land - keeping to the
makeshift road following the tyre
tracks of a thousand 4X4’s
that come and go through this harsh land
with its hard baked sand and no wind

then we saw all the dead monkeys
piled high alongside the road
all their tails had been cut-off
why? What for? we kept on walking

on the other side of the track
an even bigger stack of dead
lion and tiger cubs rotting
but not even a bird came to
pick their bones in this desert place

moving talking amongst ourselves
until we saw them sitting there
they looked like they were dead at first
they sat there absolutely still

shuffling uncomfortably
we shuddered as we passed them by
blood spurting out from one mans nose
we can’t believe they’re still alive

a little girl on the tour said:
look daddy that man's not quite dead
but her father dragged her away
‘they haven’t killed the natives yet’

at the end of the walk there was
a stack of leather shoes and some
old cosmetics and toiletries

when we reached the safari lodge
hotel no-one wanted to eat
except one man who insisted
on tasting the monkey-tail soup.
WI11-191107

The above was originally posted here on my STG Bloggage.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Dream - One

The following was written from a dream I had in 2007, I originally posted this piece on my SweetTalkingGuy blog for a poetry prompt: One horse powers a thousand dreams...

ONE HORSE

The Kings soldiers come in the night
kill his father, rape his mother.
'You can't make a silk purse...' they curse
as they force the pig farmers wife
one after another till dawn.

They tie the boy to a donkey
so that he has to run behind.
They ride out of the piggery,
fording the cold stream at first light.

When they are sure the boy can't read
they cut out his tongue for the dogs
and brand him with a hot iron
urinating on his fresh wound
they leave him lying there bleeding
for the camp-followers to find.

In an un-interpretable
hieroglyphic of his own hand
he scrawls his last thoughts on the wall
of the royal stable in blood:
One horse powers a thousand dreams...
TOP3-221007

At the moment I'm busy doing the February Haiku Challenge over on my SweetTalkingGuy Bloggage...

But here's something to keep you going - Round the world race!!!

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Carry On Tuesday # 142

The prompt at Carry On Tuesday is:
After all, tomorrow is another day.

Here's mine:

BERLIN
Don't you just hate it 
when the telephone rings???
Berlin Berlin Berlin, 
Berlin Berlin Berlin.
Pronto, what you want ha?
Greetings, it's Gretchin I'm calling 
because it's time to talk about things.
Things? What things? I don't like the things that you shout about!
We need to talk about the weather
in case there's a storm. 
After all, tomorrow is another day.
I've still got the umbrella you gave me, 
I don't think that it's torn. 
There's no need to worry 'cos it never rains, 
it persists it down in this town when it pours.
Don't you just hate it 
when the fat lady sings???
Berlin berlino, 
berleno Berlin, Berlin.
'Cos it's time to go home!
Back to the trouble and strife and the squids 
and that old thing they call work!
Berlin berlino, 
berleno Berlin, Berlin.
Berlin Berlin Berlin, 
Berlin Berlin Berlin.
Berlin berlino, 
berleno Berlin, Berlin.
Berlin Berlin Berlin, 
Berlin Berlin Berlin.
31012012

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Total Recall - Post One

The prompt at CarryOn Tuesday
is: Is that all there is?

SIXTY NINE

Inside outside down under the arches
nearly fourteen in nineteen sixty nine
trying to shelter from the pouring rain
I thought I was alone until she came
I heard the telephone ring first and then
the train on the overhead railway
before I saw her step out of the booth
she was dressed to kill done up to the nines
flashing no nickers fur coat and high heels
flesh coloured tights up to her threepennies
Is that all there is? I thought to myself
Want some business Chuck?
she says spitting gum
How much do you charge love? I said for fun
Cheeky what d'yer think that yer gunner do?
I've got a son at home older than you
When she saw I was soaking wet she said
I'll tell yer what I fancy a brandy
C'mon I'll tek yuh fer 'alf a shandy
She took me to the Union Hotel.
24012012

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Song # 706

CHRISTMAS DAY
This song is now on my STG bloggage...

Monday, December 12, 2011

A Comedy Script.


SCRIPT (For The Claremont) by Anagram Andy.
Last time I came to a comedy night at The Claremont, Colin Bell was King of The Kippax and the revolving doors were still here.
The bouncer outside handed me a leaflet that said: COMEDY NIGHT and Magician! In big letters.
And underneath that it read: Tuesday – Liverpool Empire, Wednesday – Manchester Apollo, Thursday – The Claremont!…
I said, “There’s got to be something wrong with that?… How much does it cost?”
The bouncer said, “It’s free to get in… but you might want to pay to get out!”
I gave him the leaflet back, and started to push the revolving doors open, I was half way round when I heard him shout “And, take your bike clips off!”
I had visions of Strangeways and me dropping my soap in the shower, so I carried on walking all the way round, and back out into the street again. I was half way to the Bee Hive when I remembered that I’d chained my bike to the pipe outside, so I came back.
“That’s funny,” I said to the bouncer, (Scratching my head) “I’m sure I had two wheels when I parked my bike here before!”
“That’s not funny!” said the bouncer… “What’s funny is that bloke from the Magic show! He came on a pogo-stick…(Bong, bong, bong!)  …and he just left on a Unicycle!" (Doing the cycle impression and whistling, Raindrops keep falling on my head!)
Anyway, just to confuse you… I’m Anagram Andy, Ian Biro’s my pen name… my real name is Parker… The magic marker!
Only joking, (Slobberchops impression) They call me Slobberchops…  when I go like that! (Slobberchops impression again)
I used to write with a magic marker, but like the jokes, the ink dried up!
So, I went to the doctors the other day, to find out what was wrong with me.
I said,  “Doctor, I think I’ve got a drink problem!”
He said, “Why, how much do you drink?”
I said, “About ten pints of bitter!”
He said “Don’t worry about it, ten pints a week is about average!”
I said, “But, Doctor I drink ten pints a session!”
He said, “Yeah, but how many times a week do you go out?”
I said “ About three times a day! …. Can you help me Doctor?”
“Okay,” said the Doctor, “What you need is a holiday, just lay off the beer for a bit, and drink the odd red wine!”
I was talking to that geezer at the bar before, did you see him?… with the ski mask on?… I thought I know him!… I’ve seen him on the telly!… I’m sure they said he was a Swiss banker… on Crimewatch!  
So I Said to him, “What’s it like in Switzerland these days, mate?”
And he said, “It’s all down hill, mate… (doing the slalom impression with his hand!)”
So I asked him (raising my right hand up slowly) if he knew what those…
He said “If you do that in Berlin, you’ll get arrested!”
So I asked him again, I said “Do you know what those trains are called that go up mountains?” (Raising my right hand up slowly)
“No,” he said. “I don’t know what they’re called, but they are a funny colour!” 
“Funicular?” I said, “Where are you living these days, mate?”
He said, (Raising his right hand up slowly) “Up Bury New Road!”
I thought, He’s goin’ back down! (doing the slalom impression)….  Some people do have, Strangeways! 
Anyway, we go everywhere all the time, and we were in Switzerland ourselves a few weeks ago, and when we got to the campsite…  there was a big notice, it read: (In an exaggerated German accent) ‘Welcome to the Jung Frau Campsite. You WILL enjoy yourself!’
And some bright spark had scribbled underneath with a magic marker: “But not here!”
It’s a funny place Switzerland, they speak three or four languages, it’s the same  wherever you go in Europe, whatever language you speak to them in, they always answer you back in perfect English.
Like I said, we go everywhere all the time, and we were in Paris the other night, and we did the sights, up the Eiffel tower, (raising my hand up slowly) and down The Champs Elysees, (Doing the slalom impression) up the little funicular to SacreCoer, (raising my right hand up slowly) and all the way back down to Notre Dame, (Doing the slalom impression).
I said to this French bloke, I knew he was French because he was wearing a beret and a string of onions round his neck. I said “Where’s the dead centre of Paris mate?”
And he said “Pere La Chaise!, follow me…” ( Impression - do him pushing his push-bike, exaggerated, and whistling Raindrops keep falling on my head!).
“Bloody ‘ell,” I said, “if I’ve got to walk like that…  I’ll need a drink!”
“He was doing the Bistrot!” ... 
… and I thought I’d give my French a try, So I went in this Bistrot… and I said to the girl behind the bar “Bon Soir, Mademoiselle, Un Vin rouge sil vous plait?”
And the Turkish barmaid…  answered me in perfect English, She said “Chicago, hey Mac?”
I said “No, Manchester!” 
And she smiled and said “Bobby Charlton!” (Do the comb-over impression).
And I couldn’t tell if she was taking the piss out of my haircut… or what?
I got one of those Internet deals, the other day, five quid to Italy!… And the car hire thrown in for free!…   I said, “Five quid!… that’s cheaper than staying at home!    I’ll take two!”
When the tickets arrived they were for Venice…  I said the only thing we’ll be driving there is a gondola!
But we went, because we’re daft like that, we’re wet behind the ears… but we like canals!… we go everywhere all the time, if we’re not here, we’re there, and if we’re not there, we’re somewhere else!
So there we were in Venice, taking in the sights, up the Rialto bridge, (Raising my right hand up slowly). And back down all those steps…(Do the Slalom impression)  We went up The grand Canal, (Raising my right hand up slowly). And down all those little side canals… (Do the Slalom impression).
Eventually, I thought we better go for a drink, so I parked the gondola up…         …and  we went into this bar in San Zechariah. The barman was pouring Galliano into a row of glasses on the counter.
He said to me “Pronto! Senora, Harvey Wallbanger! Capisce!”
 I said “No gracie,  Una vino rosso, par favore?”
And he replied, in an American accent…  “Sorry, sir, we donna sella de red vine! … Try the Holts’s pub next door!… ”
I said, ”Bloody hell, I’ve come all the way from flamin’ Manchester… (Raising my hand up slowly) ‘cos they don’t sell it in The friggin’ Claremont, either!” (Doing the Slalom impression).
“Only joking! Mine’s a pint of bitter mate!… with two straws, and a cherry on top!… hold the Sambuca!”
Talking about Yorkshire… It’s not funny,,, but there’s a joke in there somewhere!
I went into that flag shop in Leeds last week, and I said to the fellow behind the bar, “Do you sell, red wine?”
And he said, in a perfect German accent,  “No, ve’re a flag shop, ve sell flags!”
I said, “What about Union Jacks?”
He said, “Vwhat about ‘zem?”
I said, “What colour are they?”
He said, “Zey are red, Vite and blue!… You daft get!”
I said, “Give us a blue one!… and a glass of red wine… and a bottle of white to go!”
Anyway, I better go… ‘cos I’ve got a taxi waiting to take me to the airport… and if that bloke that chained his bike up outside still wants a lift, he better come with me… ‘cos he won’t be riding it home tonight.
I was going up that travelator at Asda the other day, (Raising my right hand up slowly). and this fellow in front of me said that he needed to buy some slip on shoes… because he couldn’t reach to tie his laces anymore!
I said, (Doing the slalom impression)‘Bloody ‘ell that’s nothing! I need slip on socks!’
He said to me “do you know what day Christmas is on?”
I said, “I think it’s a Friday!”
He said “That’s okay, as long as it’s not the thirteenth!”
We were in Ireland in September, and I broke my reading glasses in County Wicklow, and I couldn’t see to read a bloody thing, I sat there in the car, looking at the map, trying to find the cottage we had booked for the week… When a farmer pulled up in his tractor. I asked him if he knew the way to Hollywood?
He said, “You’re going the wrong way, mate! You’ll have to turn round in that field, but watch out for the Leprechaun!”
“Leprechaun? I said, “what does he look like?”
The farmer said, “You’ll recognise him… he’s got a rabbit tattooed on his forehead!”
I said “A rabbit?… Is that so he can see in the dark?”
“No!” said the farmer, “The Leprechaun’s going bald, and a rabbit looks like a hare from a distance!”
I thought, That’s a good idea! … (Scratching my head!)
Talking about tattoo’s, an anagram is a sort of word tattoo…
And two of the biggest brands of the last century were Levi’s jeans and Elvis Presley… Elvis and Levi’s are of course anagrams of each other, and if you think Elvis is dead… You should know that an anagram of, Elvis Aaron Presley is: Seen alive, sorry pal!
And that an anagram of, William Shakespeare is: I am a weakish speller!
And here’s a fishy one for you,  Pere La Chaise, is Hearse Plaice.
And my pen name, Ian Biro is an anagram of Nairobi!
But the best anagram of a persons name belongs to John Marshall who used to run The Buzz Club comedy night, down the road at The Southern Hotel. He called himself Agraman the human anagram! Which of course is an anagram of anagram!!!
If you like anagrams, you might like this.
I was walking past the post office one December morning, and it was the week when everybody got their double giro and the Christmas bonus, so there were two policemen keeping everyone in line, and there was a notice above them that said, Please queue here, with an arrow pointing to the post office sign.
But some bright spark had rearranged the letters, so instead of it  reading: Princess Road Post Office, it now said: (and wait for it, ‘cos this is explosive!) It said: Please queue here, to crap on pissed officers!
Last time I told that story, someone said: ‘You sound like, An angry Adam!’
Which of course is an anagram of Anagram Andy!
Finally!!! I was talking to that robot at the bar before and do you know what he said?
He said: (In a robotic voice) If you fancy our barmaids, DON’T DRIVE HOME!
Which is a good message… but then he got really boring…
He said: (In a robotic voice, again)                                                                                              
Did you ever see those crazy kids at night?                                                               
That cycle on the roads without a light!                                                                            
The way they race along the gutter jumping grids! (Raising my right hand up slowly)
Using the double yellow peril as a track…                                                                 
They’re a nightmare for a driver psycho kids…                                                       
And when they do the downhill… slalom (Do the slalom impression)                 
Along the broken white…                                                                                        
Even Moss Side drivers have a fright!                                                                        
So, watch out for crazy psycho cycle kids tonight!
GOOD NIGHT!
08122011/1

Friday, December 09, 2011

Song # 704

DO DAT DUNE
Dirty ditty
der der dum
dum do
der der
der der der
dum dee do
der der
dum dum
dum der der dee
der do
dirty dirty
ditty der
dee dum dum do
don't d'yo do dat dune
09122011

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLXV

Written for and posted to 3WW 
The words this week are:
Carnage, Puncture, and Jerk.

Here's mine:

“Benney, you bar steward, you’re meant to be picking me up at CostaFortune, remember? It’s nine twenty now, and we said eight thirty! Where the puke are you?” Wendy leaves the message on Benney’s cell phone, she’s outside the coffee shop on Market Street, and she’s pacing up and down, making ever more frantic calls to people who are just not listening. ‘We’ve got a full day ahead of us’ she thinks, ‘and Benney’s gone AWOL!’
“Oh hi, this is Wendy Naisa from News Galactic Corporation, I was hoping to speak to Doctor Curbishley, this is his personal number, isn’t it?”
“DOCTOR CURBISHLEY IS NOT AVAILABLE AT THE MOMENT / HE IS IN A MEETING / HE IS OUT OF TOWN / HE IS…”
“Blooming Nora! the silly Burke’s got a pet robot!”. She says, thinking out loud, and shaking her mobile thing, then adds quite audibly, “What a jerk!”
Quickly she tries Benney’s number again, this time he answers. “Sorry Nish!” he starts, “It’s murder and mayhem on the roads this morning. There’s been a big crash on the Parkway, it’s absolute carnage out here!”
“How long do you think you’re gonna be, Benney?”
“I don’t really know, Nish! The trouble is I think I’ve got a puncture, on top of everything else, I’m at the garage now, I’ll bell you back as soon as I’m done, sorry!”
Wendy shakes her phone again, and then her head violently from side to side. ‘What a waste of a morning’. She thinks, and heads back inside the coffee shop. “Give me a regular black coffee”, she tells the girl behind the counter.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLXIV

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Figment, Inclined, and Vulnerable.

Here's mine:

FIG LEAF
"It's Wednesday if you feel inclined,"
Dawn told Dave about the three hot words.
"Vulnerable as Eve's fig leaf,
should Adam feel the inclination." Mused Dave,
"Or maybe that's  just a figment of my imagination".
26102011

Poetic Flash Fiction in 51 Syllables.
Write a piece of flash fiction in just three American Sentences.
Allen Ginsberg's American Sentence has seventeen syllables.
Your task is to use as few words as possible to fill the sandwich.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLXIII

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Breach, Ember, and Tentative.

Here's mine:

EMERGENCY !!! EMERGENCY !!!
(PLEASE CALL AN AMBULANCE)
Balderdash fire + brimstone reaction
Radioactive balls of fire emerged...
Emergency please call an ambulance!!!
Ambient temperature? It's pretty cold!
Colder than yesterday when it was hot
Hotter than a cat on a hot tin roof...

Tin roofs take tentative embers to breach
Emergency please call an ambulance !!!
Nine Eleven, (in UK Nine Nine Nine).
Tin roofs take tentative embers to breach
Ambient temperature? It's pretty cold!
Tin roofs take tentative embers to breach
I'm happy if you are with this version
Vision, revision - the building's on fire!
Emergency please call an ambulance!!!

Emergency please call an ambulance!!!
Make way to let the fire crew get through
Balderdash fire + brimstone reaction
Emergency please call an ambulance!!!
Radioactive balls of fire emerged...
19102011/4 
You can read the short version of my Extra Special You post HERE

Saturday, October 15, 2011

FlameThrowerPoetry - Extra Special You

Welcome to my Extra Special You post. This is the shortened version, if you would like 
to read the full post, where I have posted 37 different acrostic anagrams of the revealed acrostic word 'Constantinople'  then you'll need to Clink~Dis~Link!!! Pronto.

EXTRA SPECIAL YOU
(PLATONIC SONNET)
Paparazzi mug-shot, genie of love
Loving me like I was your other ex
A round peg in a square hole so what's new?
Two four six eight, count to infinity...
One of you will be the one for me now
Now that we know that time is running slow
Infinitely, yes you'll be the one now
Could you be the one? pull the other one!

Slower tock than a broken clock can tick
OK Corral and all that filmic pap
New Zealand's been there quite a long time too
Now that I know that you are A okay
Extra special you, if only you could...
Tic-toc clock slow down don't mess me around
E4-13102011/4


Extra Special You (Revealed)
Could you be the one? pull the other one!
One of you will be the one for me now
Now that we know that time is running slow
Slower tock than a broken clock can tick
Tic-toc clock slow down don't mess me around
A round peg in a square hole so what's new?
New Zealand's been there quite a long time too
Two four six eight, count to infinity...
Infinitely, yes you'll be the one now
Now that I know that you are A okay
OK Corral and all that filmic pap
Paparazzi mug-shot, genie of love
Loving me like I was your other ex
Extra special you, if only you could...
E1-13102011

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLXII

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Admire, Follow, and Piece.

Here's mine:

HIM
It's a piece of cake
To admire and follow him
To crucify him...
12102011

It's a piece of cake
To admire and follow him
TO CRUCIFY HIM
To admire and follow him
It's a piece of cake...
 12102011/4


HELL IN GOTHAM CITY
Dawn and her pet robot said, they would follow, Dave in the Batmobile.
It was a piece of cake till they reached Gotham, and then the fun began.
Catwoman pretended to admire the cult car, and all hell broke loose.
12102011/1

FlameThrowerPoetry.. 
ABRAHAM HEIGHTS
They're walking in the double decker air
Hair down by their sides, blowing in the wind
Winding to the top of the narrow stairs
Stares from the crowd below who were amazed

Amazing but much too hard to follow
Follow them to the sky if you can fly
Fly me to the moon, pieces of eight tunes
Tuned into the radio, on and on...

And on they go, up and down the stairwell
Stairway to the skies above, walk on love
Love to admire the view from up on high
Higher than all the heights of Abraham

Abraham Lincoln and all Istanbul
Islington, London town all Abraham
12102011/2

ABRAHAM HEIGHTS (REVEALED)
Hair down by their sides blowing in the wind
And on they go, up and down the stairwell
Tuned into the radio, on and on...

Winding to the top of the narrow stairs
Abraham Lincoln and all Istanbul
Stares from the crowd below who were amazed

Higher than all the heights of Abraham
Amazing but much too hard to follow
Love to admire the view from up on high
Follow them to the sky if you can fly

Fly me to the moon, pieces of eight tunes
Islington, London town all Abraham
Stairway to the skies above, walk on love
They're walking in the double decker air
12102011/3

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLXI

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Eject, Impact, and Render.

Here's mine:

Poetic Flash Fiction in 51 Syllables
Clink~Da~Link


HOUSE FOR SALE
Letting Dawn's pet robot drive the Batmobile had been a bad idea.
Dave had repainted the cement render in order to sell the house.
Pressing the eject button was not the impact they wanted to make.
05102011

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLX

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Cherish, Guarantee, and Nausea.

Here's mine:


Poetic Flash Fiction in 51 Syllables.

Dave told Dawn that there was no guarantee that she wouldn't get sea sick. 
Although the 'trip to cherish' was up the canal, it was on a ship. 
Leaving at ten, Dawn's nausea had gone by the time they reached the 'pool.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLIX

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Yawn, Dull, and Race.

Here's mine:

BOOTLEG SONG
Don't cry for me Lemontina 
The truth is you are so dull
Even your boat race 
Your whole existance 
Just makes me wanna yawn...
21092011/2

If you like this, HERE'S a really daft song!

Daft Song..

The following is a re-working of a daft song I wrote some time ago:

MUCH LIKE ME MAMMA 
USED TO MAKE 'EM
Don't you just hate shopping
when you're out of food
Don't you just love cooking
when you're in the mood

Don't you just love pancakes
they're so quick to make
They're easy peasy lemon squeezy
much like me Mamma used to make 'em...

You just batter the pan and
flip them when they take...
Do they still make 'em in Jamaica
like me Mamma used to make hers?

With sugar, rum, and bubble gum
making pancakes is so much fun
They're easy peasy lemon squeezy
just like me Mamma used to make 'em... Burnt!
21092011/1

And here's the original on my SweetTalkingGuy bloggage.

Wednesday, September 07, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLVII

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Erode, Heart, and Observe.

Here's mine:
MY HEART + HERS
We observe the rocks
My heart + hers beat as one
Slowly they erode
07092011/1

Haiku Heights are running a Height of Haiku Challenge every day this September - check 'em out!!

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCLVI

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Drag, Mumble, and Penetrate.

Here's my offering:

SHE STINGS
She stings me like a bumble bee
makes me stumble makes me crumble.
Penetrate the fog I mumble
and the smog. But without her,
oh what a drag life would be...
31082011/2
QUESTIONS UNANSWERED
She waits she wants I want I wait - no date
I'm still waiting waiting for her to come
When will she come back to me when will she?
Why can't we act like other lovers do?
Questions unanswered but you know guess who?
She waits she wants I want I wait - no date
I'm still waiting waiting for her to come
When will she come back to me when will she?
Why can't we act like other lovers do?
Unanswered questions but guess you know who!
31082011/1

Friday, August 12, 2011

Friday Song

WHEN LOVE
BEGINS TO SING
I'm up up up up
on top of the world
hoping that I don't fall
thinking about you
waiting for you to call
then I get a message
on my old trombone
you tell me you love me 
you're thinking about me
I wanna be back home

It's a wonderful thing
such a wonderful thing
when love begins to sing
a pauper can think he's a king
It's a wonderful thing
such a wonderful thing
when love begins to sing

I can walk on stormy
water with you
with you I can fly
high up in the sky
with you by my side
and my old trombone
there's not much I can't do
you tell me you love me 
you're thinking about me
I wanna be back home
Repeat 12082011

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Summer's Day..

DARE I COMPARE THEE
(TO A SUMMER'S DAY)
Who's manipulating who
I told you they were coming
Didn't you hear the drumming

But they were only pissing on my gate
You said they were just kids that congregate
that there was nothing you could do right now
So I splash round my goldfish bowl somehow
while their in-car speakers shake my floorboards
It's like living on a fairground with hoards
of punters looking for a good-time girl
sitting on my wall in Ermin's and pearl
Yes it's okay for them to drink all day
there's not much work for their sort anyway

Who's manipulating who
I told you they were coming
Didn't you hear the drumming

Like our great-great and our great-grandfathers
in the Great War cannon fodder what for
giving some to Shiser Bill on the Somme
fifty-odd-thousand they didn't last long
Pointless as all those slaves that you once shipped
across the seas the families you ripped
apart and buried in a foriegn field
what for greed no need all that extra yeild
and this generation discarded too
the underclass we don't know what to do

Who's manipulating who
I told you they were coming
Didn't you hear the drumming

Ten-year-old thugs with hoods re-claiming goods
Criminality the buzz-word they should
lock them all up and throw away the key
rioter's looter's undesireably
incompetent non-tax-paying people
let's make an example of these sheeple
Smash and grab now they're breaking down your door
pissing on your floor burning down your store
they want what you got and not some old-hat
piddle on pome copycat tit-for-tat

Who's manipulating who
I told you they were coming
Didn't you hear the drumming
10082011

Tuesday, August 09, 2011

Song for - Your Life's a Stage..

JULIETTE
Julie Julie yeah Juliette
I've loved you since the day we met
Yeah Julie Julie Juliette
You're the girl that I can't forget

I've been waiting in the wings
but you never notice me
You've been doing all those things
with him and him and him not me

I've been waiting patiently
just for you to look at me
You're too busy patently
what you get is what you see

Write me into the next scene
let me say Your Life's a Stage
Romeo knows what I mean
waiting waiting for an age

Julie Julie yeah Juliette
I've loved you since the day we met
Yeah Julie Julie Juliette
You're the girl that I can't forget
09082011/1


Monday, August 08, 2011

Song...

MUCH TOO LITTLE (TOO LATE).
It's much too little too late Babe
it's much too little too late
think about it, don't you know
that I still love you so Babe
but, it's much too little too late...

You know I never ever
wanted to hate you
In fact there was a time
I wanted to date you
but you said you
didn't wanna play away
now you tell me 
that you love me too
but, what can I do?

It's much too little too late Babe
it's much too little too late
think about it, don't you know
that I still love you so Babe
but, it's much too little too late...
 Repeat
08082011

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Tuesday Tuesday..

THE LOONYVERSE
Wings, flying things
made from bits of five-pointed stars
They're everywhere in the universe,
the multi-verse and beyond
You only have to look upwards
and check out the night sky
Pentagonals, pyramidicals,
triangulation gone sideways
Seven seems to be the numeric
out there with spacey stuff
We can't get enough
we're as mad as the loonyverse.
26072011
 The above is also posted on my SweetTalkingGuy bloggage..

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Carry On Tuesday July 12th

Your prompt for Tuesday July 12th
This week, we have the first line of Oliver Wendell Holmes poem Contentment
Little I ask, my wants are few
To read this beautiful poem visit Carry On Tuesday Plus 

Here's my offering:

WHISTLE WHISTLE...
Little I ask, my wants are few 
and nobody knows the answer 
wherever I go, I'll never know 
and you'll follow me for a shilling
and the cow bells will ring - sing sing 
dingaling-ding, ding ding, do-de-do 
don't you know it's true, whistle whistle  
Little I ask, my wants are few
and phew, who can tell the answer
wherever I go, I'll never know
even if ever you were willing
and the Bow bells will ring - sing sing
dingaling-ding, ding ding, dum-de-do
in rhyming slang twang, for you - whit whit...
12072011

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCXLIV

The words this week at 3WW are:
Alter, Fond, and Tranquil.

Here's my offering:

DOLCE LATTE VITA
There was a girl who was fond of cheese
She changed her name to Latte Louise
Tranquil Marian
Cheesetarian
The alter ego of Cheese, Please Tease.
08062011

Thursday, June 02, 2011

Three Word Wednesday CCXLIII

The words this week at 3WW are:
Erratic, Luminous, and Omen.

Here's my offering:

Luminous yellow
Erratic as a bullfrog
Must be an omen
02062011

Luminous yellow
Erratic as a bullfrog
MUST BE AN OMEN
Erratic as a bullfrog
Luminous yellow...
02062011/1

Don't forget - It's never too late to take The NaiSaiKu Challenge? 

Friday, May 06, 2011

Mountain George (RIP).

Writer's Island: Season

MOUNTAIN GEORGE (RIP)
Mountain George, at ninety-three - it's over
Over to us folks that don't understand
Underscore seasons as day turns to night
Nigh on a century for, Mountain George.

Taken before he knew we knew about...
About him living there outside the inn
In the shepherd's hut, miles from nowhere
No one comes unless the post is taken.

George, yes you will be missed by everyone
Every one of us and your friend Olive
Olya, Comrade O, made us remember
Reminding us about you, Mountain George.

George lived the life we wish we could enjoy.
Enjoy yourself in paradise now, George.
06052011

Friday, April 01, 2011

NaPoWriMo 2011

 NAPOWRIMO 2011
Sitting here waiting for midnight in Manchester, April fool? perhaps!
Are they sleepless in Seattle, restless in Rio de Janeiro?
It's exciting and it's fun, it's NaPoWriMo and it's just begun.

I will be posting my NaPoWriMo attempts on my SweetTalkingGuy blog.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Sunday Scribblings #258


The prompt this week at Sunday Scribblings is BIG.

BIG DISCO
Twirly Whirly Shirley
my Champagne Rose
I don’t need no
shampoo to talk to you
A mediocre wine
will surely do
A beer or three to
put me in the mood
My Champagne Rose,
for making love with you
Your dancing feet,
sticky sickly sweet heat
 The big disco beat
warms my heart for you
Remember the dance
that we used to do
Late at night at Pips
in The Roxy Room
With your ball gown
and your stiletto shoes
Everybody knows
you’re my Champagne Rose.!
Why don’t you hit me
with flowers again?
13032010

Friday, September 24, 2010

Three Word Wednesday CCVII

Written for and posted to 3WW
The words this week are:
Gait, Nudge, and ripen.

Here's mine:

DREAM
I know you saw the missiles coming
but did you see the castles in the sky?
As they gait like horses at full gallop
speeding through the thinning clouds.
If you could dream, you could give my
green tomatoes a nudge to ripen.
24092+10

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

For Camille at Pierrefonds...


TWEET TWEET
Where the clouds hang low in the sky
and the sun lights the countryside blue
 yellow greens into gold
and so the pictures unfold...
When the paint on the canvas is set
the artist sits out in the street
Rue Gagny, Eragny, Camille Pissarro
and the lollipop trees look so neat
Tweet tweet!
17092+10

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Writer's Island Inception

HERE'S A LITTLE SOMETHING
Hi everybody, sorry I've not been around for a while. I always find it difficult to find any blogging time during the summer, and this year's been no exception. The bad news is that my schedule is about to get even heavier over the next few weeks, so don't expect to see much of me until mid October.
WRITER'S ISLAND INCEPTION
I like the sound of the word Inception, and I thought I'd write a Haiku, but when I wrote it in my head all I could hear was a rhyme, so perhaps it's a Rhymku, anyway here goes:
RHYMKU
Deception question
Imaculate conception
Think inception think
20082+10

AMAZING SENTENCE
So I thought about the above and I came up with an amazing sentence, of course I didn't actually write it, but I kind of abridged it, slightly.

In the beginning was the word, the word was God, the word was made flesh.

FOLLOW THAT
Then I got to thinking that Inception should be in the title of my poem, so I expanded it into a Heyku which is actually spelt AQ which is a weird kind of riddle where the answer is in the question. However, the more I thought about it the more I realised that my Rhymku was already an AQ. So I decided to expand it in a different direction. I chose a NaiSaiKu, where the title is capitalised in the middle, and when I wrote it down I realised it was a palindrome too.
MY NAISAIKU
Deception question
Immaculate conception
THINK INCEPTION THINK
Conception immaculate
Question deception
20082+10/1
FINALLY
I hope you have enjoyed reading this, and may I leave you with the final summation:

My Haiku Rhymku
Palindromic NaiSaiKu
AQ Heyku, phew!
20082+10/1

Thursday, June 24, 2010

World Cup 2010/4

England 1 - 0 Slovenia

Banish the athletes
Let the footballers showboat
The beautiful game
23062+10

England settle down
Germany's last game is next
Four more wins will do
23062+10/1